Today Doug and I discovered a turtle trudging up a hill in our backyard.

Me:  “Oh!  He’s so cute!  Do you think he’ll let me hold him?”

Doug:  “Probably.  He looks like a regular turtle.  But if he hisses or snaps, drop him.”

Me (tenderly stroking his shell):  “Nice turtle. Niiiiice turtle.”

Turtle:  “Hiss!  Snap!”

Doug (three hours later):  “It’s a good thing you didn’t pick up that snapping turtle. I just googled them, and they can turn their necks 180 degrees and take a finger clear off!”

Nothing beats having a guy who’s always got your back—give or take a digit.