Me: “I decided I’m ready for another dog.”
Doug: “No more dogs.”
Me: “What if we were to get an English bulldog? You’ve always wanted one of those.”
Doug: “They’re purebreds, and they live less than ten years. And I’m not listening to you cry for another three months over a dead dog.”
Me: “Then we’ll go to the pound and get a mutt.”
Doug: “How about I pound you with a mutt?”
Me: “I’m serious. The Bean is depressed. All she does is sleep.”
Doug: “That’s what dogs do!”
Me: “I’m getting another dog. And if you don’t like it I’ve got a $200 doghouse that neither of our dogs ever used right in the backyard.”
Doug: “Hope you like shoveling shit.”
This isn’t over.